I saw a post on IG that was about surrendering our dreams for Gods will. Being willing to surrender our dreams for Gods will…

It’s an odd perspective for me because I’m naturally the type of person who believes that if God put something on my heart, it is His intention to bring it to pass. The post was specifically speaking about marriage. This woman said she has surrendered her dreams of being a wife and mother to God. She let it go. She is no longer praying/believing for it to happen for her. She is letting go and letting God. She is ok with the thought of marriage and motherhood not being in God’s plan for her.

I honestly don’t know how I feel about this. It sounds great because I think we should be able to surrender anything to God. Especially when the dream/goal takes up a lot of space in our faith and our actions. BUT, isn’t this the entire premise of having faith. That we are to believe and trust that God will give us the desires of our hearts…

That with even faith as small as a mustard seed, God can move mountains and bring forth miracles, and answer prayers…

So I am conflicted with this one. On the one hand, I want to say God, Your will be done; which I do say often. But does that mean that I have to stop dreaming and believing that my desire to be a wife one day will happen?

There appears to be a fine line here. All the women who still believe in love and marriage are at a crossroads.

I want to go deeper and acknowledge the truth that maybe, it is ok to still believe for something while letting it go when you feel that this goal/dream has become an idol in your life. Maybe the woman who posted this felt as though she was obsessed or consumed with the want/need to be a wife? Maybe she was caught up in the when and the how instead of trusting Gods timing? Maybe she was trying to manipulate the situation and take control?

In this instance, I understand the need to let go. We have to give things back to God when we step into His territory. We have to relinquish the power we are trying to take and give it back to God. When we are waiting for God to answer prayers it is a hard space to be in. The waiting is not fun. It’s mostly doubt and fear and trust and patience all wrapped into one. And it’s easy to want to take control. Sometimes we tell ourselves God told us to do this or that simply because we want things to start moving. When we’ve reached this point while waiting on God, that’s when it’s time to step back, reflect, repent, and let go.

I don’t feel that I am at this point when it comes to any of the goals I have. And when it comes to marriage, it has crossed my mind that maybe I will end up a woman who never gets married. The thought of that breaks my heart because I am very much a lover girl who loves love. I can’t imagine being single as a 50+ year old woman. No offense to anyone in that situation but it’s now how I see myself. I firmly believe that God has someone for me. And I also firmly believe in Gods timing.

Let’s take the time to sit and reflect on how we are doing when it comes to our goals. Are we obsessing over them and disregarding God when it comes to the actions we are taking? Or are we keeping the faith while letting God be God in our lives?

I have fallen victim to taking matters into my own hands in the past, and it never turns out well. God will redirect our paths when we get off course and start making moves without hearing from Him first, but why go through the hassle? Let’s commit to trusting God the first time. Let’s learn from past mistakes and do better. The future is at stake.

To the mom who is getting anxious, wondering how much longer you’ll have to raise these babies alone, I feel you. It’s hard. I am so tired of doing every single thing and every decision being up to me. I am so tired of being the good and the bad cop. I want to be in mommy mode and never have to discipline my kids again. I want to be the soft mother they need to reassure them on their tough days. I’m tired of giving the lectures that a dad is supposed to handle. I’m tired.

I don’t believe single motherhood is the end all be all for me. I trust that God will fulfill that desire for me in His perfect timing.

But back to the original question…

If marriage is not in my story, will I be ok with that? Will I be able to accept it? Will I be good if I hit 50 and still don’t have a hubby? But will God’s will for my life be enough? Is it worth it? God’s will for me is what matters. I want God to give me what’s best for me. He knows all things and I trust him. Will I be sad if marriage doesn’t happen for me, yes. Will I be disappointed, yes. But I have to believe that there will be a reason for that, and that God will fill that void with His love and a purpose driven life that makes up for that desire I wanted so badly. God causes all things to work together for good for those who love Him…(Romans 8:28). I have to believe in this truth. I have to trust in His word.

So I think the moral is to find a balance between surrendering your goals to God while also still wanting the desires of your heart to come to fruition. Don’t make your goals/dreams into idols, don’t let them become bigger than God. And be open to the outcome of your prayers and your faith. Believe that all things will work out for the good of those who love the Lord.

If surrendering a goal feels more like giving up, then that may not be what God wants you to do. Remember, we have to take all of our concerns to God. He will guide us and give us peace about what to surrender and what to keep praying about. But it must be said that surrendering something doesn’t mean you don’t believe. And praying about something often, doesn’t mean you need to surrender it. It’s all about where your focus and your faith are when it comes to God and yourself…that will determine how to handle each of your specific goals/dreams.

Trust in God, He is for us and wants us to have a happy and peaceful life.

Blessed are those who keep fighting for their dreams while partnering with God and allowing Him to work miracles in our lives.